check please.

Just waiting for the break.


I feel like I'm a candle; being burnt from both ends. I don't feel that I'm literally burning but more that I'm being burnt out; with a quickness. I have been on the go, on the grind, fighting for some positive change in my life as of lately.

When I was in Seattle, WA back in June for my best friends wedding I had the chance to get to know one of the groomsman (I was the best man). Rob, is an entrepreneur of sorts and is a talented aggressive skater with an incredibly unique personality and outlook on life. After getting a chance to hang with him and just see him around people I realized that his life follows that pattern in which his tattoos profess; on the front of his fore arms he has "Positive" and "Energy" inked on him. It sounds insignificant when contextualized but it is very powerful when you realize that it actually influence his life.

I've been heavy in my heart and mobile in the mind trying to uncover ways to create a more positive sense of being lately. Life carries so much grief and sorrow and pain that it's seemingly impossible to be optimistic unless your worldview stands firm amidst that torrential downpour; I do firmly believe that a solidified Christian worldview can do that. However, amidst the bitter and restrained religiosity that I've seen exemplified in the name of Christianity I've been utterly numbed at times.

To live a life absent of pride and full of sacrifice is the whole intention of the faith I lay claim to. However, because of my struggles and issues I fall astray to walking the straight and narrow; slide away from being unselfish; pretty much miss the whole point to be honest.

With school and work. With work and school. Life is so chaotic and demanding that I tend to crumble to pessimism and run from optimism; that's sad yet changing.

In the words of Tupac, "baby keep ya' head up." That's what I'm trying to do; keep my head up. That way I don't drown in the flood of life's trials and tribulations.