Sunday, January 30, 2011

Hollyweird; love it or leave it

"eew." "gross!" "nasty!" "Disgusting!""Worldly!!!" These are descriptive terms, and no, they aren't related to me with my shirt-off untanned, these are terms I've heard in the past few weeks to describe Hollywood (aka-Hollyweird). People have all sorts of presuppositions about Hollywood; most of them accurate. It's dirty, it's dangerous, and it's full-of-trouble; again, not terms describing me, but the soon-to-be-city-of-my-dwelling. I've got friends from the northwest that didn't even realize Hollywood was an actual city, but more of a state-of-being, which, when you look at some of the weirdo's down here you may wonder if they think their in a physical literal place or a simple, "state-of-being."

I've spent the last 16 months, 3 days, 6 hours, 24 minutes, and 13 (and counting) seconds living in the 6th safest city with a population of 100,000 or more (according to a report conducted by the F.B.I.). In other words, Santa Clarita is about as dangerous as a box-of-kittens. Whereas Los Angeles has over 275 homicides last year, and that was a fifty-year low! They said it hasn't been that low since, "... the Beach Boys were in peach fuzz and crew cuts has it been so safe to live and play in the City of Angels..." Santa Clarita had approximately 15 last year apparently, which I believe that means that they quit counting after ten, and probably just figured a round-number is a better looking stat.

Either way, it's kind of like moving from Germany to Baghdad; apparently. However, I am not so concerned about these rates. As alarming as they may be, I'm from Spokane, and as many of you may know it is the, "Meth Capital of the United States." Yes, you heard that correctly, they don't kid around in Spocomton; they go big or go home. So, it's not as if I haven't been around weird stuff before, but I must say, Hollywood takes the cake for weridness. And to top all this off I got a graveyard shift working at a Denny's on Sunset Blvd smack down in the middle of the craziness. So, just when I thought I couldn't quite possibly see anything more awkward than a transsexual dressed up like a clown riding a unicycle with a ghetto-blaster on his/her shoulder listening to Lynyrd Skynyrd, I was wrong.

I guess in a lot of ways the weirdness is what draws me. Their is only so much creativity to be found in the 6th safest city; theirs not much mystery to the cookie-cutter people or the somewhat boring and monotonous lifestyle of Santa Clarita people. It's not to say their aren't a lot of phenomenal people in the area, that couldn't be more untrue. However, the majority of that region is happy to settle, and comfortable with the compromises they've made to achieve the lifestyle they have. Good for them. That's what they wanted, that's what they got. The security and safety for the family and the lack of surprise, that's what draws people to a city like Santa Clarita. However, for single 25 year old's it like an elephant graveyard; a land of nothing but married people and kids, which can be somewhat awkward at times.

I know the stigma that floats above the heads of those who attempt to "make-it" in Hollywood. As I go to bars, diners, cafes, laundry mats, tourist shops, and many other stores here in Hollywood they're laden with working actors and comedians. Also known as semi-unemployed 40 year old guys who dress like they're 20, and still want to date 20 year old girls. We have a term for that in America, its called, "a creeper." I am doing everything in my own power to not be like, um, well ,"That guy." So, as I inch closer and closer to a career in comedy I learn to appreciate more upon each step the weirdness of the community I'm in. I officially moved in about 2 hours ago and I've never been more excited about being thrown into a fire.

I know many things are refined by fire, like gold for instance. However, I also know a lot of things are burnt by fire, like my sleeves when trying to burn off the tags of clothes I have on. But, to get to the point, this so-called and highly-metaphorical "fire" isn't going to be quenched by mediocrity but only by holistic abandonment of laziness and genuine pursuit of hard work and utter-creativity. I know that this move is only a mere-shift in the long term need to find the path I was meant to be on; so, as I embark on this exciting new journey my hopes and prayers are that it would be as fulfilling as it has the potential to be.


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